Monday, December 29, 2014

Dealing with Family Gatherings

If you're anything like me, family gatherings are a constant struggle. From hearing stories you've heard a million times to having a relative ask you about your nonexistent love-life, any family gathering can be tiresome. But, have no fear Tiffany is here to tell you a few secrets to getting through the holiday season.

1. Remember to breathe.
Many of our problems, whether dealing with family, co-workers, or roommates, can be solved if we just take a moment to breathe. If Aunt Susan goes on a 20 minute rant about how she was married with two kids by the time she was your age, making you path of education seem irrelevant, just breathe. Know that you have chosen the path that is right for you. Not everyone gets married right out of high school, so don't sweat it. Just think: you can sleep in without interruptions from children. As Elsa says, "Yes, I'm alone, but I'm alone and free."

2. Don't play into ignorance.
Going home after being away at college may pose more problems than you anticipated. We usually are unaware of how much we have changed until we surround ourselves with the people (family and friends) that we grew up around. Going back, our eyes may be opened to the ignorance of the people around us, whether that be sexism, racism, or ageism. However, it is important not to engage in a verbal battle, because it is like arguing with a brick wall. Remember to tread lightly through the unsure waters of ignorance.

3. Just smile and nod.
Sometimes, if you want to have a peaceful and non-detrimental holiday, or visit in general, you must take what your family says with a grain of salt. Just smile and nod. With some of my family, arguing will get you no where; thus, nodding and ignoring their ignorance has a better pay-off. Later, you can invoke your pre-teen self and complain about them on Tumblr.

4. Take breaks to recharge.
Once you've spent any amount of extended period around a large group of people, it is important to separate yourself from the group and recharge to keep you from snapping at the simplest questions. If you are an introvert, like yours truly, taking small breaks can be a heaven-sent. Take a long shower, go for a walk, offer to take out the trash, or, in extreme circumstances, take unnecessary bathroom breaks. Do whatever it takes to help your mental state. Family visits, or group gatherings in general, should not call for panic attacks.

5. Look on the positive side.
Once you've tried the aforementioned steps, try to think positively. Just remember, you are only visiting. The visit will soon come to an end, and you will soon be able to escape to your home for peace and solitude. Keep a mental countdown and remind yourself daily that the end is nigh. Let's face it, once you've left your family, you will miss them, even though that is hard to imagine now. So take the good with the bad because, in the end, you do love these people.

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