Photo Credit: Tiffany Conley
Crossing into Adulthood
But what is horrible, ladies and gents, is the secret slump of your twenties, the terror of the unknown, graduating college and feeling lost. Why is it that you're at your peak of happiness during graduation and suddenly filled with anxiety every time someone asks what's next? For someone who was (and kind of still is) an over-achiever, I was not prepared for the existential crisis that is your twenties. No one fully prepares you for leaving school. Think about it: we spend the majority of our lives in a classroom. I've spent 21 years total in school. That's crazy. My identity is school. We are not prepared to exist outside of school. Now, I know what you're thinking: "Tiffany, don't you think you're being a bit over-dramatic? Can't you just get a job to fill the emptiness left behind from graduation?" And to that dear reader I say, "Yes. I've explored that option. I've applied to over 50 jobs, lowering my standards with each application. However, unlike Harry Potter, I was not the chosen one for those jobs." No one tells you how useless and embarrassed you'll feel after you've spent months looking for a job upon graduation from Grad School to only find rejection.
In order to help future (or current) twenty-somethings struggling with this same slump, here are a few things I wish someone would have told me:
- No one is perfect! We all can't have the perfect life, i.e. job upon graduation, proposal soon after, and an awesome vacation to celebrate. Don't be afraid to make mistakes.
- You're not alone. Despite the fact that Facebook makes you feel that you are the only one suffering this twenty-something existential crisis, believe me, you're not alone. People, usually, only put the best (or, in some cases, the worst) parts of their lives on social media, which makes them look perfect. Their social media pages are as real as reality T.V.
- Plans change and that's okay. It's completely normal to not have a plan upon graduation. Or, as in most cases, have your plans fail and be forced to allow changes to occur. You are not a failure if you do not immediately have all the answers to finding your dream job.
- Be persistent! You may have to complete hundreds of applications just to have the chance at a couple of interviews. Nevertheless your time to shine in a position will come. Someone will take a chance on you despite your awkward interview skills and your "lack of experience." That's what happened for me, even though I began to lose faith. Nearly one hundred applications later and I've been offered a job.
- Stay patient and positive. I know that the twenty-something slump can stink (trust me, I'm the queen of pessimism) but keep your heads up my friends. It may not feel like it at this moment, but something awesome is coming your way.
